Friday, March 13, 2009

Defining yourself


What is it about definition that not only makes us who we are, but also what we resent. Once you are in your Thirties you have basically defined yourself. You have lived long enough and made enough decisions that you cannot say something is an accident, yet even then, you can point to events and say that is why this is an exception.
Really though, there are no exceptions, you are what you are. To use a football analogy, Bill Parcells is on record as saying it best. "You are what your record says you are" Don't act like you should be an 8 and2 team when your record is 5 and 5. You can point to those three last second defeats in which the other team scored on the final play or the one where the wide open receiver dropped a sure touchdown pass on your fourth down play with time running out. It doesn't matter. You gave up those last second touchdowns. You are the one that dropped the touchdown pass while you are wide open. You are not 8 and 2 YOU ARE that 5 and 5 team.
You have defined yourself its okay if you are 9 and 1 when you believe you should be 10 and O that is different. Maybe that one loss was an exception and maybe you won those 9 games without any of them being close.
By your midlife you are who you are and even if you don't like it, that's how it is . You can still play out the string but you are who you are, Even some 5 and 5 teams can still make the playoffs and maybe you can also. In the end though thats all you have done. your 5 and 5 ass is not going to the Superbowl. You should just be happy that you did not get your coach fired. You have defined yourself and the events of your life and the people you have meant something to, and who have meant something to you, have created a certain definition about yourself.

1 comment:

Compulsively Yours...for now said...

yes but....if you would like to redefine yourself you may do so at any time. i used to define myself by all the wrong things, making myself a constant victim and guess what???

i was constantly in situations where i was a victim over and over and still i struggle with this.

i guess the older you get the more you realize that you will eventually run out of time to do all the things you had planned to do. so one day you wake up and actually live your life as if it is truly yours to live, and that day is good indeed.