Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Rain

Never been to Seattle, ever. Gotta figure these last three days is what it would be like though, with all the rain. This is some mutant rain. This is rain with an attitude, rain that was raised by a crackhead mother who paid rent by dealing and hooking. Rain that has no morals, has no integrity, just nasty street thug, wiseguy , school skipping, trouble making, crack dealing rain.
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Look, I am a native Floridian so I know that bullshit we spread about Sunny Florida has a grain of lie within the piece of salt we try to rub on those Midwesterner's and Yankees cheeks. It will rain here all the time, especially during the summer, but its usually a sophisticated, conscientious, caring type of rain. A rain you can count on in the afternoons, A rain that calls home if its going to be out late. a considerate neighborly type of rain that you would not be ashamed to take home to your mother. These last three days I don't even know this type of rain. Its like I am a 75 year old grandmother and just now heard my granddaughter rain was living in sin. I am just shocked by the rain lately, and don't get me started on all the lightning. That's like those punk head Goth kids all of a sudden hanging out with your little angel children. Bad influence I tell you.
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Tomorrow is another day and another chance to run the treadmill.

7 comments:

Quin Browne said...

"Its like I am a 75 year old grandmother and just now heard my granddaughter rain was living in sin"

now, that is a great line. it's not too often i lie in bed, my laptop on my, um, body..(when you lie down, you don't have a lap per se) and laugh hard enough to make it slide off.

i did on that line.

"said" Woman said...

I think you got your funny back!

Bill From Gainesville said...

Quin- :) Also Like a 75 year old grandmother I think I just talked about weather.
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Said... do you think so? or is that like when you are out searching for your puppy and you actually spot him for a few seconds, but then he runs from you? -- Cause Thats what I think its like, but thanks what you said was like you are on the other side of the yard with my puppy and are shooing him back in my direction!

Todd said...

Is it a hurricane? I heard you sometimes get those down there.

Brian in Mpls said...

Def. found your funny bone..lol

Bill From Gainesville said...

Todd--- This rain is like when you get an innoculation. its a tiny tiny tiny dose so that when the hurricane comes you are resistant.
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Brian, thanks ... dont know if I found it for a while or if its like Handley Ramirez Getting a hold of one while still in the middle of a 1 for 25 slump? either way, thank you...

The Charming Hedonist said...

When your funny came back, did it bring mine?

And really, what IS with the rain? It's friggin' monsoon season.