Thursday, June 5, 2008

86 days

The most beautiful time of the year is football season. This is very obvious, because during Football Season they play football.
We have 86 days to kickoff, but only 79 days till game week. If you were living in 1910 you could go around the world in 80 days, I know because I saw the movie, and that's with hardly any roads and stuff, and cars that only go like 35 miles an hour at best. Getting across the ocean required a ship, cause they had planes in 1910 but they couldn't make it across the ocean. So 79 days to game week is like looking at a par 5, but you bombed the drive and only have 185 in to the pin. Give me the 5 iron and lets get her there!...or I guess if it was 1910 and we had 185 yards to get to Football season we would use the 3 iron because the shafts were only wood and stuff back then, plus we would be wearing a tie to play golf in? Either way, in June, in Florida, its really awful hot to be playing Golf, just like it will be a scorcher on August 30th, when the Rainbow warriors from Hawaii step out on to Florida Field. It's a 12:30 game .
A friend called to tell me about that most ridiculous of times to play football in Florida. August 30th at 12:30 in Gainesville? Hopefully Florida will make sure they have enough space heaters on the sidelines. That's brutal, so what do you do? hang out at the tailgate and watch it on T.V.? or go inside and have that sun beat down on you? And a 12:30 start means getting to the tailgate by at least 7:30 or so, and even then it will feel like you are late. I guess this is a small benefit of not being married, because no way my wife would ever have it together enough to be at a tailgate by 7:30. So there it is, this is why we are getting a divorce, basically she couldn't work around my tailgate plans so I had to let her go.
The defending National Champions come to Gainesville later on in the year. The first team that ever won a national championship with two losses. Their coach did beat the Gators last year with all those gutsy 4th down calls, and those Cajuns seem to love him to death. Look at this photograph I stole from another website. I'm Busy? Fear the hat? Watch out Les Miles, because now those crazy coon asses expect a National title Every time you only lose two games.

And what about this one? Doesn't it look like Mike is sniffing Glue?, Hey Mike the tiger, that's not crack cocaine, Stop snorting that crystal trophy!

And I think this last trailer kind of speaks to several issues. For one, look how big their heads are compared to the size of the stadium. Those are some big big guys. But also, notice around the top they have all those other SEC school logos? know why? cause LSU is in the SEC and week in and week out they play the toughest competition in America and they feel honored to do so, as a fan of an SEC school myself, I get it .... Love the rest of ya, just enjoy when the Gators beat you even more.

We tailgate right by the century tower and if I truly show up at 7:30 in the morning, on that first game day I am sure the people that are already their will call me a slacker.

So only 86 days left. I wonder if that cow that I am going to make my tailgating hamburger out at the grille on that particular Saturday is still standing around in some cornfield in Nebraska right now? Or is he already on his way from the slaughter house to the Publix?


Quin Browne said...

grilled cow.

can life get any better? (unless, of course, you are the cow)

The Charming Hedonist said...

Mmmmmmm..... cow.

Really, I'm psyched about football this year! I mean, come on, we all know Georgia is going to kick Florida's ass again. Who WOULDN'T be excited?!

The Charming Hedonist said...

Oh, and Les Miles is a douche bag.

Bill From Gainesville said...

Quin-- Hamburgers from a grill, out on the Florida campus under the oak trees, drinking a beer and talking shit is one of the all time best ways to consume cow.
HEDO--out of every 17 years Georgia beats Florida maybe 2 times, Knowshon took it to us last year so that needs to kind of be a good memory for ya-- and you guys are WAY overrated this year so I just dont see it, but at this time even Vandy fans can dream and did YOU ever read my ladder post?
HEDO 2 - Douche bag indeed, but a fourth down going for it till my heart explodes kind of Douche bag. and by the way a few LSU fans relatively regularly read my blog (My analytics tells me so) but dont worry about offending them they never comment they are just lurkers.