Not gonna do it... Don't even bother asking me...

I just want to make this clear, I do not intend to Coach The Notre Dame Football Team next season. See, I am just like Coach Meyer . We are happy with our current positions, and really like living in Florida.
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Blind Side was good.

Blind side was good. Not as good as the book, they never are, but in the book Sandra Bullock was not playing Mrs Tuhey either. The Guy playing Michael Oher nailed it as did Sandra.
I still cannot watch Lawrence Taylor breaking Joe Theismans Leg though. I have to turn away.
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Worth the money to see it while it is in the theaters. Certainly worth a rental in a few months.

STUPID SHIT I HAVE DONE IN THE LAST TWO DAYS!

Its like I am telling on myself.
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Most of the time when people do stupid shit, but no one else knows about it, They will keep it to themselves. Lots of time that is exactly how I roll as well. Not today Internet. TODAY, I am going to out myself as it were, about the two stupid things I have done in the past day and a half.
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One is milder than the other. I will use that as my warmup. The second one actually cost me $100 bucks.
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THE WARMUP STUPID THING:
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Let me just set the scene, It is Thursday Night, I have gotten home from work, I have put in a workout (This particular workout was seriously half ass, but Still, a half ass workout is still better than no workout right?) I am home now and thinking about my plans. I Heart the Miami Dolphins and know they are playing on T.V. tonight but it is on "Direct T.V." which I don't have, and I think to myself that I need to take a shower and get dressed and go to a bar somewhere so that I can watch it, all while cursing the NFL for this cable ass bullshit they are pulling. -- I am tired, I had worked my ass off the Wednesday before last night, flying up to Tally at like six in the morning and getting back at 7:30 at night, then playing a Late night softball game, getting to bed late, exhausted and then of course working all day in the office on Thursday Night. I decide that as much as I would like to watch the Dolphins, I am just not up to going out, so I just stay home and watched some comedies on NBC and then went to bed. -
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On my way in to work it dawns on me, THAT GAME LAST NIGHT WAS NOT ON THE SUNDAY TICKET! IT WAS ON THE NFL CHANNEL! MY CABLE PACKAGE HAS THE NFL CHANNEL! I COULD HAVE WATCHED THAT GAME BUT I WAS NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT THE HELL THE DEAL WAS ! UGHHHH... STUPID ME.
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It gets worse though and it has the same theme of not paying attention, but this time it was not just my missed opportunity to do something I like to do, NO, this time my ability to NOT PAY ATTENTION busted my ass to the tune of $100.00. That's right Internet. I cost myself a C- NOTE.
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On my drive into work this morning, just before I arrived, I had a phone call from a buddy of mine and we were talking about the FSU game which is in 8 days. Am I coming to the tailgate etc.? What are we going to cook, blah blah blah ... During this conversation I let my buddy know that YES! I am coming to the Tailgate - That weekend is my Kid weekend though, and I do not think I can find 3 Tickets together for a decent price etc. so I am just coming up for the tailgate and will watch the game on the T.V. at the tailgate spot. We hang up and I go into work and ALL BE DAMNED if in my E-mail there was not an Employee looking to sell his FOUR FSU tickets for $100 bucks total. I am like Holy moly! this is the Universe looking out for me, I call the dude up and tell him I am down for it and he brings them to me and we do BUSINESS. I bought FOUR FSU TICKETS For $100 bucks TOTAL! --- WOW! just incredible good fortune but of course a minute or so later I realize that the e-mail said nothing about Florida Florida State, the E-mail was this guys offer to sell his FOUR Florida FIU tickets. I had just been so caught up in my little world that I read it wrong ....
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I decided that although I would tell the World on My Internet. It would be to embarrassing to tell the dude about my mistake and see if he would take them back. So I will just eat them -- No way that I am driving the two hours up to GVILLE to watch that game as I already have plans to watch it on T.V. in a bar.... Unless the bar doesn't get Pay per view? -- Okay Not going to make that mistake. I called the bar to confirm and they DO!

My two encounters with Florida's Next Governor

A few weeks ago I met the democratic nominee for Governor of the Great State of Florida. (we were drinking.) Okay, I was drinking. all right, full disclosure, it was at a fundraiser thing and they had some wine, so I had a glass. She was asking me for money. Okay, more disclosure, She was asking everyone that was at the thing for money. That was the whole point of the little get together. I shook her hand really quickly and said something stupid, got nervous and then made a fart sound with my armpit and my hand, bailed out of that situation and caught a waiter with some meatballs and those little toothpicks on a trey.

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Yesterday, I ran into her again while I was up in Tallahassee and she tried to act like she didn't remember me, but this time she wasn't asking for money, so I think our relationship is developing nicely. (Seriously who forgets me?) I was in a group and she was speaking to the whole group, then she bailed out, so maybe she did remember me but she certainly did not wink back at me.

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I might have made the part up about making those fart sounds with my armpit and my hand, but the thing about the meatballs was absolutely true. They had swedish meatballs at the fundraiser (I like to turn my profile to people and hold the toothpick on the side of my nose so it makes it look like I have gigantic, meatball looking boogers, that dangle down above my upper lip) Thats just me.

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I did know that I shouldn't do it in that particular situation, however. I feel like my restraint is quite remarkable when I concentrate on it, but in all honesty I was wondering if it would have gotten a laugh? I once stuck some money up my nostril at a real live party though. Its kind of my idea on how to pick up women. If you have twenty dollar bills hanging from your nostrils they just assume you sneeze money. Chicks seriously would dig a guy that sneezes money. At least until this damn Swine Flu epidemic.

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Seriously, Swine Flu is killing my game.

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TEBOW IS BADASS

I found a new blog that is basically a hyper blog devoted to "Tim Tebow" the point of this blog is to write about Tim Tebow. Thats what every post is about. Something about Tim Tebow.
The point is to address Hyper Local blogs with the twist that its not about a neighborhood, but about a single person. A very famous person to be sure but every post is about him either directly or indirectly.
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I love the guy myself, HUGE TEBOW FAN HERE, and think he is the greatest College Football Player that has ever suited up. Before him, my vote for that honor was a Georgia Bulldog. (Herschel Walker is still the Second Greatest College Football Player of all time) Anyways I Stole this Photograph from that blog and he evidently stole it from LSU FREAK. The link is www.timteblog.com
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Tebow is All about being Above and Beyond, He makes Promises that get written up on metal and placed on Huge Ass Football facilities of Big time Football stadiums WHILE HE IS STILL PLAYING THE GAME. He gets himself put in the Ring of Honor while he is still PLAYING FOOTBALL IN THAT STADIUM! Seriously, the stadium that he plays his home games in, has a tribute to him. He is up there with Weurffel, Spurrier, Emmit, Youngblood and Wilbur. None of these guys ever got up their WHILE THEY WERE PLAYING. Other than Spurrier, all of them were actually done playing Football when they were honored. Spurrier still Coaches and was doing that when he got in but he is like a peanut shell of himself compared to when he was reaking havock in the SEC, Now he just occassionally upsets an SEC team. He is just a shell of who he used to be when he was at FLORIDA.
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Tebow Saves Third World Children's lives in the offseason, or at the very least their foreskins on their Penises, and he is the only person in the world that can wear "Crocs" and make them look good. He is just badass! and this picture speaks the truth, even though it is doctored by LSU Freak and doesn't really exist anywhere.

Biggest Loser is Awesome

Love watching the biggest loser -- Tonight they had a makeover. Seriously, just some Good looking fat people. I mean that in the best way. they are seriously fat. but they are kicking ass. I am overweight myself, but I am happy with a pound a week or so in weight loss. I understand I have a Job and I have a social life. I am not living on a ranch where All I do is work out and eat right. I eat right about 3 or 4 days a week. I eat okay another day or two and usually eat like shit and drink to much one day or so a week. They get pissed when they lose "only" 3lbs a week.

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See you Rebecca.... Should have lost more than 3lbs this past week and not get below the yellow line. Don't Be such a bitch when you get voted off. (I would have voted for LIZ myself, but I am not on the show) Still, don't get all whiny...

"The Blind Side"

Fired up about "The Blind Side" -
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I read the book about 3 years ago. It was like two books in one. It had the Story of Michael Oher, but it was also an analysis of the Left Tackle position and the evolution of that position. Pretty sure the movie is just going to be Michael Oher's story but that is okay.
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The last time I looked forward to seeing a movie this much was probably "Rocky"

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Plus Sandra Bullock Is HOT!

Three Cans of Dip, Wrapped up like a present!

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Saw TO giving a little lip to some of his coaches today! The implosion is about to start.
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I made a little bet that Percy Harvin would score more fantasy points then TO this season and so far so good. Hoping that TO goes into Implosion mode real soon!

A shout out to Giant Karaoke machine making Corporations

Tomorrow night is Karaoke night. Last Time I went all Billy Joel. This time I don't know.
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Love to do a little "Dinosaur" but it is so rare, only Hank and I can do it because The Karaoke Company does not load it up into their little Karaoke Machine, damn Karaoke ass communists!
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How can I get my Country Rock Star on when the evil Karaoke Corporation wont load my song on their machine!
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There are Lines like " Them aint High Heel Sneakers" and " Gay Guitar Pickers don't turn me on" Thats just great Song Writing right there....
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COMEON GIANT KARAOKE MACHINE MAKING CORPORATION! WORK WITH ME HERE!

Take the Governor off the Porsche Mr. Addazio, for the love of all that is good in the world.

This is Coach Addazio.
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He is the Gators Offensive Line Coach and Offensive Coordinator, and also the perfect example of the Peter Principle.

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Last year and the year before that his only duty was as the Offensive Line Coach and he did an excellent job. Our Offensive Line was dominant. It is still an above Average College Offensive Line. It really helps when you have two future NFL linemen in the middle. (The Pouncey Twins will both be high draft picks)

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His play calling though seems to be pretty limited. He calls the dive play up the middle. He calls it again, and then he calls for Tebow to do Tebow stuff and fix the problem that is 3rd and 4.

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Back in the Doug Dickey era when the Gators ran the wishbone they would throw it more often then they do now.
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Its like this: The Gators are a Porsche 911. Just a bad ass car, You can see it. Tebow is the Driver and Addazio is the crew chief. He has put a governor on that car though and won't listen to the people begging him to unhook that thing and let that car do what it is capable of.
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He does have an awesomely shiny head though.

Stuff I am Grateful for

My Dad
My Kids
Having friends
My Job (and my boss for hiring me)
Watching The NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE!
Being on a Softball Team
The location of My Apartment
Beer
women
Watching College Football
The Internet
Pat Tillman
The United States of America
My Divorce Lawyer
Psycho Ex-Girlfriend
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(not a complete list)

A kid weekend....

This weekend was a kids weekend for the Billster.
Here they are on my Stoop, My Boy is wearing his Earnest Graham Bucs Jersey all proud like, because the BUCS WON TODAY. WooHooo!!!


Here they are in front of the Cracker Barrel. This is the general drop off point where I meet their mother for the Child Exchange. It is Mile Marker 79 on I/75. It works out well for me because it is only about a 45 minute drive from my apartment. It works out well for the Ex, because Her Boyfriend lives somewhere near this place.




This is a picture of my kids and the "RISK" board. after four games they finally took me down. They colluded to not attack each other and ONLY attack their dad. They did that before, but this time neither of them got very sentimental about owning Madagascar to break their treaty. They wore me out and were so proud in kicking my butt.



Think of the picture below as if I was a deer with some big old ass antlers and they were Deer Hunters that had just shot me. They are posing over their kill, and the Kill was me! (getting beat at Risk by my children) It was both a sad thing and a happy thing for me, at the same time. Pissed because of the negative mark on my "risk" playing abilities, and positive because they worked together and kicked my butt and they are my kids.


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World Domination it was and my daughter ended up being the winner, going on to take my son down later...

The bifurcated life

Ultimately, everyone is just trying to live a life that is fulfilling, and interesting and has some meaning.
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Some people do it better than others.
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People that think about it, constantly judge themselves.

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Ultimately I believe it comes down to comparison for everyone. Why did I end up the way I have ended up? Not that I think I am at the end, but at this point in my life, why is it still so hard for me? At this point I expected to have much more, both financially and emotionally.

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I basically do okay in life, but metaphorically speaking, the deal is that I throw the football way to much.

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I live my life like the run and shoot. It's an impressive offense and all, but it leaves your defense on the damn field to much, and besides, it is totally susceptible to the interception. Sure I need to run the football more than I do, but I just can't help myself and feel like throwing the ball is the way to go.

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My life is basically pretty good, but the highs are not as good as the lows are bad. If, and again, metaphorically speaking, I ran the ball more, I may not have the ups of the 75 yard touchdown pass but maybe the lows of getting life run down the gullet would not be as painful either.

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I hate that I let my life get so bifurcated. I hate that it is such a dichotomy.

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Still I continue to line up in the shotgun with the no back set and five wide.

Poor fantasy football management

So I have Josh Brown on my Fantasy football team and he did this today:
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Of course I had him on the bench because, Come on, he plays for the ST LOUIS Rams.
Just poor player management on my part. - Doesn't matter though because I won anyways but still...